The unexciting real answer...

Canadian here! They are just a throwback to when bottles of maple syrup were larger and made of earthenware pottery. It’s really just nostalgic. Plus if you heat your maple syrup in the bottle, you can use a kebab stick or whatever to haul it out of the hot water by the handle.

Otherwise known as a ‘skeuomorph’.

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Skeuomorph

A skeuomorph is a derivative object that retains ornamental design cues (attributes) from structures that were necessary in the original.

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Isn’t it basically just liquid sugar or something?

You have been auto-banned in two different ways: at r/Canada and from the nation of Canada itself.

Maple syrup

Maple syrup is often used as a condiment for pancakes, waffles, French toast, oatmeal, or porridge. It is also used as an ingredient in baking and as a sweetener or flavouring agent. Culinary experts have praised its unique flavour, although the chemistry responsible is not fully understood.

Also - Canada’s strategic maple syrup reserve.

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I love that scientists still don’t know why certain tree juices taste so good.

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Scientist 1: “Look what I got…” He hands the bottle to Scientist 2. “Check this out.”

Scientist 2: “Oh, man. This is the total primo shit.”

Scientist 1: “Should we investigate why this particular tree juice tastes so good?”

Scientist 2: “Yeah, I guess so. But after we have pancakes, right?”

Scientist 1: “Hell yeah.”

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They are armed and screaming in some kind of broken French?

They’ve come to arrest you but their sense of geography isn’t the greatest so they think the local populace speaks French.

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