-What do you think about the pet/parent analogies? Are you a dog mom? A cat dad? A platypus owned by a dirty owl? What’s your take?
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I fucking cringe when I’m referred to as my cat or dog’s “Dad”? Are you inferring that someone in my near family fucks animals? Or that I fuck animals? If I have to take a title, as per my relationship with my animals, it’d be “Custodial Thumb Haver”. I love them deeply and genuinely feel lucky to have them. But they aren’t my kids. Because I don’t have kids. We have a mutually beneficial and emotional relationships. I didn’t have to fuck a cat or dog to have that.
It really started with soundwave. Like he’s the coolguy in the evil empire who’s always pregnant, but the babies are his friendpets who help him out. It’s the best americans can aspire to. Everybody wants the babies, they just don’t want human babies. I mean soundwave didn’t pop out little versions of himself and if he did it would’ve been stupid. In the technohell future where you can give birth to anything that dog will be your actual child, he will live in your ribcage.
