In the United States of America, the authoritarian Trump regime plans to ban the mobile app TikTok tomorrow on Saturday with an executive order. Despite this social media platform being enjoyed by citizens of all ages, this expression of dance, music, and culture is being censored amidst “concerns of national security.”

American hacking and cyberwarfare has been a long problem, including the National Security Agency hack on Chinese company Huawei in 2014. The nation’s domestic tech companies such as Apple and Google not only sell their users data but surveil her own citizens as revealed in 2013 by a brave whistleblower. State officials believe that TikTok, which was acquired by Chinese company in 2017, is a threat to national security. Repeated accusations of TikTok’s parent company, ByteDance having worked with the Chinese military, have been groundless.

This rogue state has been increasingly threatened by the rising economic and diplomatic power of China in recent few years. While facing domestic problems such as mass unemployment and a looming eviction crisis, a second deadly wave of COVID-19 which has left nearly 150000 dead spreads across this unfortunate nation. “This is because of the incompetent Trump regime which mishandled the crisis. Now faced with greatest economic recession since post-WWII, the dictator is determined to distract the American people,” our US expert, Pig Pooponballs* explains. “America and its military-industrial complex is desperate to lash out at China. In order to justify this enormous military spending, an outside national security threat must be manufactured. This is clearly a failure of its imperialist capitalist system.” He continues, “we must intervene and provide humanitarian aid at once.”

No stranger to cutthroat business practices, Trump demands the mobile app to be sold to American companies or it will be banned. “It’s the art of the deal, folks. Buying TikTok is putting America first, it’s going to be good. Very good,” he said when our correspondents reached out.

We interviewed citizens like Stacy, an 18-year-old woman who is forced to make a living making videos on TikTok. “No, please God Emperor Trump, I need TikTok to make dance videos,” she says between sobs. “Liberate us Xi, my country yearns for freedom.”

Following a month of unrest and brutal police violence across the nation, banning this beloved video media app is another example on the state’s repressive measures.

*Pig Pooponballs is the chairman of the Victims of Capitalism