Click the cringe to take the quiz, libs :cringe:

54 points
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22 points
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19 points
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8 points

Funny, I don’t have a login, and it just let me take the quiz. Some magic combo of content blockers, I guess.

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40 points

Consent manufacturing machine go brrrrr!

Have a look at the scatter graph of the actual results. There are no natural clusters there, just a correlation line between social conservatism and economic conservatism. The “Romney quarter” is absolutely fucking empty. Other than that, you can carve the rest of the line up however you want — so of course, the Times carves it up in such a way that the neoliberals have a plurality. This is a bad, bad article, just from a statistical point of view.

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if it makes you feel any better, the guy who made this is senior fellow at the New America Foundation, funded entirely by billionaires, corporations, and the US state department lmao

edit: also that scatter plot shows that libertarians don’t exist, so at least that’s true

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15 points

The other funny thing about this is how it divides up the Trump party from the Dominionists, as if there was any actual difference between them in the wild…but it does conveniently make each of them smaller than the Hillary party.

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yeah seriously the only difference laid out by the quiz is that the Patriots are poor and the Dominionists are rich

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8 points

so, it’s useless

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6 points

Love it, Elizabeth warren is literally off the edge of the chart.

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5 points

If the goal was to create six parties based on the scatter, I’d say draw two parallel lines with positive slope, and define three points along each of them: you could probably keep the original names too

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28 points

Ayo how come there’s no authleft smh this is Marxist-Leninist erasure

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even the most economically left party is run by capitalists lmao

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7 points
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It’s “Socially Conservative.” top left would be Nazbol under their question set. You can get bottom left even if your politics are “Shoot anyone with more than $25 in their bank account and open the forced catgirl conversion camps.”

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full 20 quiz questions below if you are paywalled

All have options listed as strongly disagree, somewhat disagree, neutral, somewhat agree, and strongly agree unless specified

  1. Racial minorities have mostly fair opportunites to advance in the US today.
  2. It’s the responsibility of the government to reduce the income difference among people.
  3. Should same-sex marriage be legal? (Yes, No)
  4. Gun control laws should be… (Stricter, No Change, Less strict)
  5. How easy or difficult should it be to immigrate to the US (Much easier, Slightly easier, No change, Slightly harder, Much harder)
  6. Do you favor or oppose providing a way for undocumented immigrants already in the US to become citizens? (Favor, Oppose)
  7. I think abortion should be… (Legal in all cases, Legal in some, illegal in others, Illegal in all cases)
  8. American society systematically advantages white people.
  9. Weathly people spur innovation.
  10. Local governments should decrease the size of police forces and the scope of their work.
  11. How do you feel about reducing government regulation of business?
  12. Today, discrimination against white people has become as big a problem as discrimination against Black people and other minorities.
  13. It is the responsibility of the federal government to see to it that everyone has health care coverage
  14. How important is the issue of climate change to you? (Very, Somewhat, Not very, Unimportant)
  15. An important reason some people are poor is because the economy is unfair.
  16. Marijuana should be legal.
  17. When it comes to really important questions, scientific facts don’t help very much.
  18. I would rather be a citizen of the US than any other country.
  19. Should the government raise taxes on incomes above $200,000? (Yes, No)
  20. The minimum wage should be raised

Click each of the party names for their descriptions:

Progressive Party

The Progressive Party is focused on equity and racial justice, with a strong vision of inclusive social democracy. Its strongest support comes from politically engaged, highly educated younger people, especially women.

Its potential leaders include Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Elizabeth Warren or Julián Castro. Based on data from the Democracy Fund’s VOTER survey, this party would be the best fit for about 14 percent of the electorate.

New Liberal Party

The New Liberal Party is the professional-class establishment wing of the Democratic Party. Members are cosmopolitan in their social and racial views but more pro-business and more likely to see the wealthy as innovators.

Its potential leaders include Pete Buttigieg, Cory Booker, Eric Garcetti and Beto O’Rourke. Based on data from the Democracy Fund’s VOTER survey, this party would be the best fit for about 26 percent of the electorate.

American Labor Party

The American Labor Party is focused on economic populism, with an appeal to working-class Democrats who don’t have college degrees and don’t follow politics closely. It is more moderate on social and cultural issues compared with the Progressive Party, but also more diverse, appealing to many working-class Hispanics.

Its potential leaders include Sherrod Brown, Jon Tester and Tim Ryan. Based on data from the Democracy Fund’s VOTER survey, this party would be the best fit for about 12 percent of the electorate.

Growth and Opportunity Party

The Growth and Opportunity Party is the socially moderate, pro-business wing of the Republican Party. It is the heir to the old moderate “Rockefeller Republican,” the East Coast wing of the G.O.P.

Its potential leaders include Larry Hogan, Charlie Baker, Mitt Romney, John Kasich and Michael Bloomberg. Based on data from the Democracy Fund’s VOTER survey, this party would be the best fit for about 14 percent of the electorate.

Patriot Party

The Patriot Party is the party of Donald Trump’s 2016 primary campaign: the coalition of the small town, white working-class Americans who feel left behind by globalism and condescended to by cosmopolitanism. It is economically populist and strongly anti-immigration. Its strongest support among lower-income conservatives comes from exurban America.

Its potential leaders include Josh Hawley, Tom Cotton and Tucker Carlson. Based on data from the Democracy Fund’s VOTER survey, this party would be the best fit for about 14 percent of the electorate.

Christian Conservative Party

The Christian Conservative Party is focused centrally on issues of religious liberty and morality, with very limited government. It will find stronger support among the most politically engaged and affluent, especially men.

Its potential leaders include Mike Pence, Nikki Haley, Tim Scott and Mike Pompeo. Based on data from the Democracy Fund’s VOTER survey, this party would be the best fit for about 20 percent of the electorate.

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23 points
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Of fucking course they give the liberal party the biggest cut of the pie in their imaginary America. Lmao.

Never change NYT

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11 points
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11 points
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1 What does it mean by mostly. Better than before? Yes. Entirely equal? Not at all

4 Which ones? There are certainly some laws need to be stricter and some that need to be much looser.

7 What does all cases encompass? Does this mean the conservative stereotype of “literally day before birth”?

17 what important questions does it mean

This is why internet quizzes fucking suck, fuck you NYT

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17 what important questions does it mean

Definitely the funniest question.

Libs: wE bEliEvE iN sCiEnCe. Just not enough to do anything about climate change or the fucking pandemic lmao

:maybe-later-kiddo:

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7 points
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10 points

The Christian Conservative Party is focused centrally on issues of religious liberty…

:doubt:

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8 points
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6 points

Creating a political alignment test where questions can be answered with some level of nuance challenge (IMPOSSIBLE)

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14 points

lol I got the same response. lukewarm on gun control?

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yeah that has to be the one keeping me out of the direct corner lol

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6 points

Yep

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