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21 points

When can we expect the results to be published?

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Please contact agent Johnstone @ specagentjstone@cia.gov for more details

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hexbear in shambles

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9 points

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5 points
*

I thought I was terminally online, but I guess I don’t even have the mild form if these numbers are true

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3 points

respect to our greatest posters

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Damn I gotta post more. I have rookie numbers

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13 points
*

What’s the CIA customer support line? I have to fart real bad and need them to hear it before I hang up.

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4 points

CIA customer support you’re talking to Linda. How may I help you today?

My death squad doesn’t work.

What do you mean it doesn’t work?

It doesn’t work. I told them to go terrorize the people into compliance, but they’re complaining about having to kill their own countrymen.

I’m sorry to hear that. Unfortunately, order compliance isn’t covered under our standard death squad program. Did you pay them?

Did I-… YOU were supposed to be paying them! Listen lady, I promised you guys I’d take all the IMF loans and deregulation you want, but I can’t do that if I’m not in control of the country, can I?

checks script …have you tried turning it off then on again?

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9 points

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8 points

Honestly I find “legacy posters” on here kinda weird, I don’t really think anyone should keep an account here long enough to get a reputation, really you should be semi-frequently deleting and remaking accounts for op-sec, and change the location you say your from every time.

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11 points

you just need to be lowkey cringe enough to retain an account forever but never amass any reputation or recognition

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7 points

This site is too fucking small for that to be possible.

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6 points

you should be semi-frequently deleting and remaking accounts for op-sec, and change the location you say your from every time.

thanks for reminding me

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badposting

!badposting@hexbear.net

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badposting is a comm where you post badly


This is not a !the_dunk_tank@hexbear.net alternative. This is not a !memes@hexbear.net alternative. This is a place for you to post your bad posts.

Ever had a really shitty bit idea? Joke you want to take way past the point of where it was funny? Want to feel like a stand-up comedy guy who’s been bombing a set for the past 30 minutes straight and at this point is just saying shit to see if people react to it? Really bad pun? A homemade cringe concoction? A cognitohazard that you have birthed into this world and have an urge to spread like chain mail?


Rules:

  1. Do not post good posts.
    • Unauthorized goodposting is to be punished in the manner of commenting the phrase “GOOD post” followed by an emoji that has not yet been used in the thread
    • Use an emoticon/kaomoji/rule-three-abiding ASCII art if the rations run out
  2. This is not a comm where you direct people to other people’s bad posts. This is a comm where you post badly.
  3. This rule intentionally left blank.
  4. If you’re struck for rule 3, skill issue, not allowed to complain about it.

Code of Conduct applies just as much here as it does everywhere else. Technically, CoC violations are bad posts. On the other hand: L + ratio + get better worse material bozo

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