104 points

Be a USAan

Invent a machine called the Walkie-talkie

Never walk and talk

permalink
report
reply

In high school when the gym teacher didn’t want to do anything we did a “walk and talk” that’s doing laps around the track walking. Used to love those days, it was an excuse to fuck around.

permalink
report
parent
reply
53 points

When my gym teacher didn’t want to do anything, he called Free Play and just let us raid the supply closet

I fucking loved those weird little square skateboard things

permalink
report
parent
reply

Omg I loved playing tag on those. My knuckles would inevitably get all rug burned though.

permalink
report
parent
reply
27 points

It was like an extra hour of recess. Objectively the best days.

permalink
report
parent
reply

We’d always break off and smoke weed behind the bathrooms during those days.

permalink
report
parent
reply
27 points

Our gym teacher was on his last year from retirement so he’d read a newspaper on his folding chair and have us play volleyball because that way there was a net mostly preventing us from fucking around with at least 50% of the class.

permalink
report
parent
reply
58 points

I love walking and talking. And not just because it hides the fact I have no idea when to maintain eye contact during a conversation!

permalink
report
reply
69 points

Unlike driving and talking, when I’m driving around a one ton hunk of metal that could kill people if I’m too distracted

Also how is walking around the town boring? You get more time to see what’s around you and if there’s an interesting spot you can stop and check it out.

permalink
report
reply
1 point
*
Deleted by creator
permalink
report
parent
reply
56 points

Another user here told me the average american hike is 3 miles and I have not been able to get that off my brain since. That’s the shit I do with a friend on a hangover to get some fresh air

permalink
report
parent
reply
29 points

This might just be everyone saying they like hiking these days. It’s great, but is also sure to pull down that number.

permalink
report
parent
reply

You have to remember two things

  1. Many Americans live in suburbs where 3 miles might get you out of the suburb

  2. America’s car brained infrastructure design means most places have incredibly shit accommodations for pedestrians

permalink
report
parent
reply
16 points

I mean I get the socioeconomic reasons, I think what irks me most is calling 3 miles a hike. That’s a walk. It’s fine to do a walk, it’s just not hiking

permalink
report
parent
reply

A hike should be 6 minimum, 8 ideally. Doing something like the Appalachian Trail will have you doing like 15-20/day though.

permalink
report
parent
reply
21 points
*
Deleted by creator
permalink
report
parent
reply
12 points
*

Hold on, you mean a “hike in nature”-hike?

3 miles doesn’t get you anywhere

permalink
report
parent
reply
5 points

It’s what I’ve been told and I trust every user of this site entirely uncritically

permalink
report
parent
reply

In most of the popular hiking spots in my state, once you go a mile down a trail there’s like nobody around.

IMO it’s more about duration than mileage. You can’t call it a hike if it’s under an hour, that’s a walk. I’m of the opinion that if you can do it comfortably without drinking water it’s probably a walk. That said, three miles can definitely be a hike, there are plenty of trails in the northeast US that will give you >2000 feet of elevation gain in that distance.

permalink
report
parent
reply
10 points

Much like the BMI is useless if you’re a bodybuilder statistic I’m fairly certain the average hike in the US or anywhere is not made up of a significant enough amount of hiking straight up a vertical wall to make this statistic entirely worthless

permalink
report
parent
reply
5 points

3 miles, isn’t that like 5 kilometres? We did longer hikes in third grade.

permalink
report
parent
reply

Driving and talking is too difficult, that’s why I drive and text

permalink
report
parent
reply
8 points

You get more time to see what’s around you and if there’s an interesting spot you can stop and check it out

There is nothing interesting to see in America, even in the center of most cities.

permalink
report
parent
reply
54 points

Meanwhile, me a polyam American who dates more frequently than the average person: “Let’s go on a walk date! Here’s a list of parks nearby I enjoy!”

permalink
report
reply
43 points

Stop your sinful lifestyle and only walk and talk with one partner at a time.

permalink
report
parent
reply
42 points
*

I have a date planned with 2 partners at the same time on Saturday. We’re definitely going to be taking a walk. We might even all 3 of us hold hands. You can’t stop us, sin is just too much fun

permalink
report
parent
reply
31 points

I will karate chop one of the hand holdings. If you walk on and re-join hands. I will karate chop again.

permalink
report
parent
reply
62 points

Lol I just saw a group in my town was planning a “volkswalk”. After giving it the biggest sideeye ever, I looked it up, and they’re a harmless hobby group that encourages people to go on walks, inspired by the German movement in the 60s-70s. In conclusion, Germans be walkin

permalink
report
reply
60 points

Germans doing things together in large numbers do be unsettling

permalink
report
parent
reply
31 points

As long as they aren’t in step…

permalink
report
parent
reply
24 points

I guess it’s sometimes called volksmarchen in German, which isn’t ominous at all

permalink
report
parent
reply
29 points
*

volk just means people. So its a “people’s walk.” Volkspartei would be people’s party. German is a neat language. I like their word sandwiches and accents.

permalink
report
parent
reply
13 points
*
Deleted by creator
permalink
report
parent
reply
13 points

People’s political performance review

permalink
report
parent
reply
6 points

Volksküche too, a great institution.

permalink
report
parent
reply
4 points

permalink
report
parent
reply
12 points

… inspired by the German movement… Don’t think we don’t see what you did here!

 bringing your filthy puns into this neighborhood...
permalink
report
parent
reply