Initially I did a spit take because it just seems so silly, just preposterous. But on second thought Seth Abramson is not a jokester he’s a pretty serious researcher so let’s wait and see but could this be the beginning of alien apocalypse dystopia blah blah blah…??

43 points

Every single intelligent person will literally never believe any of this shit until some time after they actually show evidence. There is literally nothing to gain from a “sneak peek” or whatever

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23 points

They’re just trying anything to distract people from the empire imploding

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33 points
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So this would mean:

1.: Aliens exist, aliens that travel through space at either faster than light speeds or, if they travel slower than light, with significantly longer lifespans than us

2.: Nobody saw any indication of a spacefaring species through any telescopes, ever, no radio signals were recorded

3.: Out of the hundreds of thousands of star systems in the milky way that have existed for billions of years, this species found themselves right here, right at this time during the few thousand years humanity exists on Earth

4.: They were able to enter Earth’s atmosphere, their spaceship didn’t burn up with them inside and the aliens themselves didn’t die within the atmosphere either (oxygen is very bad for a lot of stuff)

5.: Nobody noticed them enter our atmosphere or land anywhere, spaceships are really loud

6.: The US government found them first and managed to apprehend them and everybody involved managed to shut up about what would literally be the most significant event any of us would ever experience

No

Edit: If an alien civilization is advanced enough that they can a) travel here, b) not burn up in their ship and not have their organs torn apart by oxygen reacting with every chemical in their body and c) land a fucking spaceship stealthily without anyone noticing, then the US government doesn’t stand a snowflake’s chance in hell to capture them lmao

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23 points

i feel like the more obvious thing is the US government is using this to find loose lips

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18 points
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4 points

I would love for China/Russia to do a little trolling and confirm it, ask for the US to do information sharing and watch the Yanks pull the whole thing back quietly.

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7 points

imo aliens are likely to breathe oxygen themselves, if they haven’t messed with their own biology too much. it’s just way better than basically any other substance for powering metabolism in an organism, especially a big organism that thinks and moves around.

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4 points
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30 points

Can they cancel my student loans? If not dont care

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12 points

:eric-andre:

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9 points

I know, right? Who fucking cares if aliens visit. Fuck tourists, tourists are scum.

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2 points

This used to be a playground, but then aliens from the actual planet fitness made it into an embassy. Which is also a gym. They all are now

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29 points
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28 points

I don’t believe it at all really, I mean come on. The task of interstellar travel is just… immense. I won’t believe it until I see it really, I get that theoretical interstellar aliens would have some kind of incomprehensible tech that allows them to travel FTL but I don’t know if that’s actually even possible so yeah it’s just a little ridiculous to me

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5 points
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3 points
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4 points

FTL isn’t real and there’s no reason to believe it’s possible. You might as well just say "Yeah they wished on a unicorn to travel the eleventeen billion light years to get here.

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1 point

Yep exactly

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thank you for the response, I thought it was pretty silly myself also but then that little inner engine started spinning, and I got excited, “hey, maybe we will be able to rise above the mundane for a bit, and focus on cool, earth shattering stuff…” but yea, no.

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14 points

Well, hey if they come with actual evidence, then OK that would be really really exciting. I mean, it’s I guess possible, just don’t believe it until I see it

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4 points

Hate it break it to you, but even if we are ‘able to rise above the mundane’, this weird thing called the material conditions of existence keep popping up and have a far greater affect than any traveller.

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1 point

The main reason I’ll never believe until I see it is pretty close to yours, but also: if aliens have achieved interstellar travel, we are literal ants to them. We are less than ants, really. Why would they ever maintain secrecy? Like, what kind of weaklings or cowards would they be that they’re hiding from organisms that are less than ants to them? Maybe if they wanted to do some kind of scientific study and didn’t want to disturb us?

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2 points

Yeah also a good point. Another thing is, we’re capturing them? How exactly? Why are they such fuck ups that they manage to crash all the time also lol. The counter argument for this is to initiate contact without intimidating us, which I guess is plausible but idk seems a little far fetched

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