Life is beyond parody.
brb using DeepMeditation to train my body to have fine tuned control over things like my blood pressure so I can artificially trigger family photo music breaks more often.
I did tech support (no call center, that shit would make me snap) and the thing that really stresses you out is not the customer itself, but the fear of getting fired
This assumes that a) workplace has photos of my family and b) they know what music I like. The latter I imagine possible to get from Spotify, but for the former there is no source – neither I nor my family post anything.
So it would be extra dystopian for them to show me any montage.
There seems to be an issue with your personnel file. It says here that your file is incomplete, it looks like you didn’t submit your yearly photo package? Unfortunately, our payroll system won’t let us print checks to someone with an incomplete file, so I’m gonna need you to submit those photos in a timely manner please.
Can’t we just get it to dispense an edible instead? A Xanax?
