I was talking to my wife about the feeling of underachieving relative to unrealistic childhood goals, and she mentioned that she never thought she was smart or special enough as a child to dream of being THE anything. Like she wanted to work in science, but never took that to mean that she wanted to be THE one to get famous curing cancer or writing a Malcom Gladwell-type book or running her own lab.

I, of course, think she is the most special genius I know, and I think she’d do a great job in any of those situations, but the depressingly realistic expectations she set out of lower self-confidence as a kid have now served her well in terms of job and life satisfaction. It made me sad to hear and angry at her parents for not communicating that she was and is exceptional, but I am also sad and angry that I am not the next Bob Dylan with a universal acceptance of my genius and no need to do anything but write poetry and receive accolades. At the same time, I’d hate to actually live on the road and/or have the life of most ultra-famous writers, but I still feel like I’ve betrayed my childhood potential by not doing so and by being unremarkable.

Hard to say if that disappointment is worse than growing up without being told you even could achieve something like that. My wife is healthy now, but had a lot of shit she had to overcome in her childhood and adult mental health journeys, and while/since I have as well, I don’t think we’ll ever get answers about every different thing that affects our current and past contentedness. So I am just left with the contradictory disappointments of having failed to live up to grand self-determined goals and that no one ever told my wife she could set hers like the incredible person, thinker, and worker she is–even knowing that just may have led to her feeling my current disappointment in place of any she felt as a child.

Long and complicated, no resolution, it’s just been weird to see and think about our two very different experiences.

And I say a plant community is a group of ostensibly indie, bootstrapped musicians who are actually propped up by major labels to sell the image of individuality and independence while having the entire music industry machine behind them.

Had to replace a gear shifter on my road bike recently, not being aware that I’d have to replace the whole cable to do so and then calibrate tension for the derailleur, but similarly to your experience, the whole thing was easier than expected! Folks should definitely try such repairs and maintenance at home to get to know their bikes better, and it’s not like it’ll cost more to get a pro to do it after you’ve tried (carefully), if it turns out you can’t get the job done yourself.

I guess I may be in the minority then, just since they don’t seem quite as drastically different to me in terms of feel and difficulty to shoot with decent/moderate accuracy. I’m not shooting for points though, so I’m not too disappointed by an inch left or right at the range, especially when I’m going to be within 20 feet of any target in any likely self-defense situation. And once I learned to avoid muzzle dip (didn’t take longer than a day at the range) the double action doesn’t seem too troublesome

Easier to diagnose and fix once you learn everything, but also a lot more that can go wrong/break/jam. I’m just saying that I’d trust a revolver left loaded in a toolbox for 15 years way more than a 10 year old Glock I might see next to it if I needed to grab one and fire.

I don’t know that I agree 100%. Shooting any type of gun ought to be practiced if the idea is to be able to defend yourself in the case you ever have to, and a revolver isn’t so much more complicated than a pistol that it’s going to take much longer to get used to. What do you see as being the most difficult differences?

Coming in with a suggestion that I’m surprised isn’t more common: get yourself a revolver.

All guns are “in case of emergency” items (if you aren’t a hunter or a plinker). So if you want something that you can leave in a safe/nightstand for 5 years, and then feel completely confident it’s going to fire if/when you need it, you need a piece with the fewest possible moving/degradable/high-maintenance parts, which is a wheelgun. If you aren’t looking to disassemble and maintain it regularly (or go out to a commercial range/shop and pay to have them do it for you every year or more), it’s really the only option you can feel confident in 10 years down the line.

It’s also a great first because if you do end up collecting more, you’ll still always have a near failproof backup.

Doesn’t sound like it was such a solid relationship. He should have been way more loyal to his CEO.