Explain how.

My dogs ideology is strictly American.

This morning he saluted a cop, and called me a slur when his breakfast was late.

I don’t know why it surprised me, but I got a pretty lengthy ad on YouTube for some film Candice Owens made and it was batshit.

I guess for some stupid reason I thought Google might know better but then I remembered that’s practically their business model.

The kids are good.

Which is why we must destroy them.

Maybe it’s just me but I feel like letting Silicon Valley train you into the Pavlov’s dog of human interaction isn’t necessary or ideal.

You can do it I believe in you.

I was on the phone for roughly 6 hours over the course of two days pleading with my ISP just to give me my advertised speed. It was so hard to not get irate with the employees, I know it’s not their fault but I got the gambit. Everything between doing a power cycle, to being told they’d have to run new lines out to my house, to being told I probably just needed to use their router/modem instead of my own. I was practically groveling by the end.

I think the last customer service rep felt bad for me and just threw me a bone, he transferred me to some higher up tech guy, he looked at my account and flipped some switch and fixed it instantly.

Yeah normally I wouldn’t fuss but I was getting 20 down and 5 up. I had to fight for 50/10 and it almost wasn’t worth it cuz it still kinda sucks.

They didn’t even get a chance to live. God damn it Gary this is all your fault.

Please tell me you asked for clarification. I would’ve evaporated instantly upon hearing that.

If someone could figure out how to stop me being bombarded with reactionary bullshit from my friends and family 24/7 I’d probably still have a facebook account.

It’s odd, I deleted facebook and now I just follow random people I’ll never meet on twitter and talk to y’all.