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morningstar [they/them]

morningstar@hexbear.net
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I’ve been psychotic for brief periods before; this certainly sounds like psychosis to me. I totally get the fear of bringing it up to a therapist and what they might do if you tell them, but I would seriously recommend you think about it. It’s unlikely to just go away by itself, and may very well get worse and worse. Shit is fucked, godspeed comrade. Stay safe, and also maybe try to avoid taking your ADHD meds whenever you can; stimulants and psychosis are like peanut butter and jelly

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At one point I thought a not-yet-existent superintelligent AI in the future had realized that I had realized it was going to exist one day and it was retrocausally influencing the past and people around me to prevent me from preventing it from eventually being built, and shadowy operatives who wanted the AI to get built were following me in vans and surveilling me to potentially kill me before I could spread word to the world about the existential threat. I did a lot of hiding under my bed with the lights off and ducking behind trees from passing cars.

And word regarding the ADHD meds, that’s good that you don’t take it all the time. I was heavily abusing my meds and not sleeping when I got to that AI paranoia zone. Even moderate use is gonna make you more paranoid and irrational, but nowhere near as much as if you take a bunch and neglect sleep.

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Folding ideas is good. Solid video; the previous one on flat earth/qanon was fucking fantastic

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Yeah, one of my friends has fallen for it. I kinda feel like it’s my fault he got into it; he’s a really credulous/uncritical sort of guy and I started talking to him about UFOs which spurred him to start watching all these ancient aliens YouTube vids and shit and the algorithm got him (aliens>govt coverups>NWO/illuminati>pizzagate>qanon). He never really talks about it and he really is a good guy so we’ve stayed friends; I’ve been trying to figure out the best way to do some sort of intervention on him.

I believe/entertain a lot of extremely out-there notions myself, but qanon stuff is just so dumb and obviously fucking made-up fascist propaganda that I still can’t fully wrap my head around it’s gotten such a foothold, even in people prone to paranoid/magical thinking. So frustrating watching people get brainwashed

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Right? As a self-identified crank I personally buy a decent amount of paranormal shit, and I wouldn’t be surprised if aliens have been hanging around fucking with us since the dawn of humanity (with a healthy dose of skepticism and knowing I’m playing fast and loose with belief/knowledge claims) but like the ancient wonders were never things that struck me as requiring any paranormal explanation unless you’re a racist. (Plus the evidence/arguments are mostly dumb) I was all happy he wasn’t calling me crazy for talking about ufos but then he’s like yo ancient aliens? And I’m like noooo not that kind of crank nonsense

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Try taking the amino acid L-theanine with caffeine; it eliminates the tense jitteriness and also confers its own benefits to focus/memory. It’s present in tea but there isn’t enough to balance out the caffeine content so I like taking capsules, 200mg caffeine and 200mg l-theanine gives me a really nice relaxed alertness. You can find it at most places that sell vitamins/supplements and shit

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Damn that’s a sick track, love amon tobin

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If you’re too young to consent to delaying puberty, how the fuck can you be old enough to consent to undergoing puberty

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