Was my first experience with polyamory and im dealing with some sads. Would like to talk to people who understand rather than judge.
Poly for about a year, happy to listen. What’s up?
Joined a polycule, was in the relationship bout a year too. THE best and most communicative relationships I’ve ever had.
Things started fizzling out right as they were prepping to take a trip to see another partner (i was the newest partner) and then they broke off right after. Things are still amicable cause they were honest about not likeing me as much as I liked them but the timing is just making me feel super insecure. And that insecurity is getting in the way of staying freinds with everyone.
Dang, that sucks! Were you dating both (all?) of them or just one? Did they tell you why they wanted to de escalate?
I’ve been polyam for years now and the thing that keeps surprising me is that polyam relationships often end exactly like mono relationships…where one person is just totally blindsided by the de-escalation. The other thing that surprises me is it hurts just the same. I’ve certainly been on both sides of it many times now and it’s never any easier.
Sorry you’re going through it right now comrade
I’m sorry they broke things off with you. It can definitely feel a bit awkward if that person was the only member of the polycule you were dating, like they were or are now some sort of gatekeeper to being friends with the rest of the polycule. Are you finding it harder to spend time with others in the polycule in larger groups (with or without the person you seeing present) or in connecting and spending time in smaller groups or one on one with the others?
I wasnt really close with anyone else just freindly. And yeah theres a regular online space where we would all meet up and its sorta led by the person I was dating. Its really thrle presence of the partner they took the trip with thats making it hardest for me. They werent in that space as much until after the trip. And things suddenly broke off after I was trying to make an effort to be freindly to that metamor.
I won’t judge, but while I’ve considered polyamory, I have never engaged in such a relationship, at least yet.
Sorry to revive old thread, but there’s people here who want to talk and wanted you to know that. I’m sorry your first experience with polyamory was not a good one (or maybe it is now idk).
