:a-little-trolling: These reporters keep coming up to me and asking "Comrade Trump, what do you think about Gorbachev?

Well I’d have to say he’s a real loser. He made a big mistake folks- huge!- a big mistake. He thought he could out-pizza the Hut. Can you believe that?

Oh the Russians payed for it dearly. DOWN went the flag of the people and UP went the flag of the traitors. Now they have Putin- and I hear you saying he’s a good leader, yes, and you have your points- but you’re WRONG.

Now Stalin- and CNN is going to be very mad at me about this- that’s a great man, a man you can depend on- he’s not like those lousy Democrats, those do-nothings that lounge around all day- he did something- and you know what that’s a great big beautiful flag flying over Berlin, in that old picture, you know. The working class, they take these hammers and they use them to make stuff: Bing! Bing! Goes the hammer of the workers. And the sickle- well I don’t need to tell you how great it is, you’ve been eating- well you know it’s great bread.

And the bread came from those Kulaks, those terrible kulaks, who thought they could- they thought they could just burn those fields and Stalin wouldn’t do anything about it. Well guess what: he did! And you’ll hear the lying fake news media say that they were innocent- let me tell you folks, they deserved it. They deserved it!