Seriously, I’m generally a lurker because if I start engaging in stuff I get more and more angry. Like actual feeling it build up in your chest rage and fury. That either turns into bitter resentment that I can’t treat these fucking people to the just desserts they have coming to them, or utter defeat and desperation to just fucking cease existing.
I’ve gone to a therapist on and off for my whole life (cptsd) but I’ve never had any response. I feel like I need goddamn brain damage to function in this hellscape. I don’t know how y’all deal with chuds, libs, and just people in general without fighting back the urge to drive a truck through stuff.
Prozac.
Honest answer there comrade, I can’t. There’s no possible way for me to stay cool anymore, like, if a lib or chud starts talking shit, I’m really tempted to just go mask off because I don’t really have any energy to waste on debating their arguments. Unless they approach me in good faith, but this almost never happens for relatively obvious reasons.
Thing is, you don’t have brain damage. You’re totally fine, society on the other hand … well, it has to die in a fucking fire for all I care. Capitalism destroys both the Earth, and our very own humanity, so really, don’t feel weird because you aren’t a fucking drone, accepting to work yourself until your death, without asking any question. Recognizing the system is fucked, and that it is affecting you in all the ways you can imagine is the first step towards change.
This is where the grillpill comes into play.
Honestly: posting does help.
The point of Anarchism/Communism is not to develop an angry mindset through indulging in rage. You have to be able to see things as synthetic composites.
This is easy for natural objects, you know trees are made of wood and can’t hurt you, but gets much more difficult when you have to deal with a foreign consciousness (hologram) - you have to understand that people are massively complicated systems, and to fully resolve them you need a combination of empathy, intuition, and genuine goodwill. This will show you why people get pissed off and do dumb things.
What is incredible though, is that even this is not enough to forgive them. People are chaotic systems in a larger chaotic system, global capitalism. Understanding this system will show you why they’re all mad at each other.
To come to a fundamentally correct (Marxist) understanding of your own life inside the Imperial Core or periphery, you have to appreciate that everything you interacted with, everything you saw, everybody, was coloured in varying shades of fascism, and then try and mentally correct for that.
It’s fundamentally an ideology of both forgiveness and damnation. You have to appeal to the masses. You have to forgive them to do so.
Also, join a real org, go outside, guerrilla militancy requires enjoying fresh air, and it always helps if you’re in a good mood
