once i binged a shitload of adderall for 3 weeks to paint a realistic oil painting of a cat for my ex to try to win her back. It was a very good painting, amazing imo with my lack of training

It wasn’t even of her cat though i literally googled cats and copied one. Idk what I was thinking. She just always wanted me to paint something that wasn’t abstract lol

No it didn’t work but she still has it 11 years later so that’s nice at least

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9 points

This is definitely the most interesting one here both for unusualness and the switched perspective. Sounds like your cat did well at least.

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36 points

I was going out with this chick for a while and we had just gotten serious for maybe a month and then she just goes and sleeps with some dude, she confessed and I dumped her by text. Then she has the gall a week later to chase me down the street begging to speak to me and apologizing while I was trying to walk home. At first I ducked I into a gas station to get away but even after I left it after 5 mins I was still followed for 1/2 mile. Like bruh.

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19 points

She had the gall a week later to chase me down the street begging to speak to me and apologizing…i was still being followed for 1/2 mile.

I would have heard her out if i was you. Not because I’d take her back or believe a single word that comes out of her mouth, no, no, but the sheer audacity of doing that + the desperation to get you to listen…nah, whatever fiction she came up with HAS to be some Oscar-worthy writing instead of the whole “it was a mistake!” if she borderline stalked you to share it, and then thought for a second she still had a shot with you after.

That, or her (non-existent) balls are bigger than her brains.

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7 points

Bruh not even. During that time I would take the bus and she would pass by my bus stop, slow down make eye contact then speed up. Wierd af. Like man why are you gonna play around with someone like that. Years later she had the gall to try and speak to me after I specifically told her not to contact me again years ago, because come on who would take that shit? Good lay though.

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3 points

And I am once again reminded why you never stick your dick in crazy. The lay might have been worth it, but all the bullshit after? Fuck that, I’d rather find my someone whose not gonna make my canities worse even if the suck in the sack. Shit, I’m no pornstar myself so.

Please tell me you either put as much distance as humanly possible from her, got a restraining order on her ass, or, and god help them, she found someone else to haunt…

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1 point

thats annoying of her bro

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20 points

Lying about events that allegedly happened while we were engaged, and expecting me to actually believe her. Specially when she switched who did what.

For example. “I even cooked at late night for you!” - err… no. She only cooked for me a handful of times, all of them afternoon snacks. (I’m not a big fan of afternoon eating but I appreciated the gesture.) I was cooking for her fairly often, including preparing a “fake” barreado (kind of stew) at 3AM.

Or claiming that a common friend (a woman) openly mocked her while we were drinking with friends, and I did nothing. I was there and I remember what friend said - a single sentence, roughly “hello and bye for both of you!”, since that friend was leaving as we were arriving on the bar. Even if she wanted to mock my then girlfriend, she wouldn’t have the time to do so.

What makes those funny is not the fact that she was lying, but that they’re such idiotic lies that you can smell the bullshit from a kilometre of distance.

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18 points

Keyed my car. I’m not kidding. She keyed a message into the side of my car thinking it would get me back.

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2 points

I don’t think a lot of thinking was part of that equation.

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16 points

Broke into my home. Twice.

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