did Han Solo suck Greedo’s dick first, or did Greedo suck Han Solo’s dick first

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27 points

Since Han shot first the logical conclusion would be Greedo sucked first but that doesn’t account the possibility that Han is just incompetent at sucking. You’ll have to look into legends to get the answer, there’s isn’t enough information to be definitive in canon.

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19 points

In legends they explain that Han jizzed in his pants when the carbonite hit, and that’s his o-face you see frozen

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bows before your brilliant analysis

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