:crab-party:
Von Nukem
COME THE FUCK ON WHY ARE THEIR NAMES ALWAYS LIKE THIS?!
“Hello my name is Chudly McFartinstein”
Trying to smuggle fentanyl over the southern border. Literally always projection.
“I’m here to chew gum and smuggle fentanyl, and I’m all out of… Oh shit the balloon inside my rectum just tore open.”
Von Nukem, who was born as Teddy Landrum, told the outlet he changed his name in 2012 in a nod to his German heritage and the video-game character Duke Nukem.
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At the rally, Neo-Nazis raged against minorities and immigrants—whom racists accuse of harming the country. That made it all the more ironic that Von Nukem was arrested on March 17, 2021 while entering the United States from Mexico. On his way into Arizona, Customs and Border Patrol agents discovered 15 kilograms of fentanyl pills hidden behind the seats and floor compartment of his 2019 Nissan Pathfinder.
According to law enforcement records, Von Nukem quickly admitted that he had been paid 4,000 Mexican pesos (around $215) to smuggle the pills into the country.
Why the fuck would a guy with five kids smuggle 15kg of fentanyl across a border for $215?
lol what a fuckin dumbass. Bet he thought it was easy money because :us-foreign-policy:
215$ to move 15kg of fent??? i don’t know anything but that seems wildly low for such an insane amount of fent, what a dumbass.
anyway, lol :crab-party: :rip-bozo: :crab-party:
I honestly feel they must have been blackmailing him for something, my money is on child prostitution or something else sick that lots of tourist :lmayo: love to get up to (like why the fuck was he in Mexico in the first place!?).
It has to be some kind of blackmail or something similar. Not only why was he in Mexico, but why would the cartels trust him with…
Thirty-Two Kilos of Fentanyl Worth $28.8 Million
like $14m worth of drugs.
If sold point by point for street value this would be close to half a million. It was probably destined for bulk distro so it’d be way less there but still enough to buy a house.
Are we sure it was actually 15kg of pure fentanyl? It seems a hell of a lot more likely he was carrying 15kg of powder that contained some fentanyl but had already been cut to shit
The delicious irony that a mascot of white nationalism smuggled what was probably Chinese sourced drugs from Mexico in a Japanese vehicle.
$215? Really? What the fuck? Are we sure he wasn’t lying to try to get some kind of sympathy or something? Who the hell takes a complicated illegal job for $215?
Either a dumbass or someone who thought he could cut and run with the fent (or my other theory which is he’s a pedo being blackmailed for doing sick shit in Mexico). Either way another krakkka down!
Pro tip, that is a No Country for Old Men idea. You cannot cut and run with that much. That’s like enough to kill a town
Hey how does all this (insert drug du jour) keep getting into the country and culling the marginalized population? :cia: :who-did-this:
Lost 2 friends to it this year. One was my best friend and it’s actually the anniversary today. It’s no fucking joke.
I’m so sorry to hear that my friend. I can’t imagine how many lives have been fucked up by the opioid epidemic(s). :meow-hug:
You know the meme about selling oregano to rich white kids for $50 a gram and saying it’s top shelf kush? This is just the Nazi version of it
The first time I bought cannabis at 17, I tried to give the guy 50 euros on the street. Just out in the open like I’m buying a gyro. He gave me about a gram of a strain he only called “orange”, bottom of the barrel mids I wouldn’t buy for $40/oz in Colorado, and then insisted on coming into the apartment I was staying at. I smoked it but didn’t inhale properly so I only got buzzed while he smoked the entire gram and screamed at a football match on the television in Romanian. Outside of hitchhiking with a guy who offered a really strong vape which made me dissociate from reality, it’s still my worst cannabis experience. Just pure anxiety next to a clearly armed professional drug dealer who’s mad at Hungary.
My initial guess would be that he was paid a lot more than that and either agreed to cop to 215$ because there’s some legalese connected to it, or bc he’s trying to hide the rest of the proceeds.
But it’s also just as likely that he’s a dumbass, or that the cops are lying (they are cops, after all).
I’m so curious about additional compensation. If the cartels didn’t have something over him, you couldn’t pay me half the street value to risk smuggling in a life sentence worth of fentanyl. Trying to rip them off when he has a big family on some kind of rural property would be too stupid for a Nazi. There’s something really juicy to the story which isn’t even in the court papers:
https://storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.uscourts.azd.1264319/gov.uscourts.azd.1264319.2.0.pdf
The first part of his indictment says he also conspired to distribute 400g in Arizona. That’s a big gulf in scale though. 100mcg is what’s prescribed in tablet form.
The first part of his indictment says he also conspired to distribute 400g in Arizona.
It says “400g or more”, which most likely refers to the total 15kg. 400g could just be the cutoff at which “a fuckhuge amount that can get you life in prison” starts when it comes to fentanyl. They always refer to “400g or more” in these exact words in the first part where they describe what constitutes the offense and only to the 15kg in the second part where they refer to the “basis of the offense”, and the date for both is the same day. So i’d say they’re talking about the same crime in both parts of the document.
I love dead Nazis. Simple as.
